One day I was waiting on a straight couple with 2 teenage sons. The Mom was a total handful. In the biz we call these people “Mondays.” Why Mondays? Because everybody hates Mondays. She was ordering for everyone and thought she was a better cook than us. Add this, remove this, cook this way etc. LOL. After I place the complex order she canceled it all and the ordered something else, just as complicated. Out came the order and her appetizer. In a lough voice, which she probably thinks makes her important, announces that she did not order that she ordered something else. Her husband finally spoke up and told her that she did order that. The two started to argue when she actually said to her husband….”Shut the F*ck up! How dare you argue with me in front of the help!” I just smiled and offered to exchange it. She said “No you have ruined my night.”  I don’t know where this came from but I then told her we have Chocolate Pie for Desert (line from the movie THE HEP) He burst out laughing and she gave me the WTF look. After leaving the husband gave me a $40 tip on a $60 bill. LMAO