You Just Can Not Make This Up

There was this drag queen friend of ours. One night she was upset about something. We asked her what was wrong? With hands waving in the air and very dramatic fashion she told us how upset she was with the police. OMG What happened?  She had pulled over to the side of the road. The police stopped and told her that if she did it again they will give her a ticket or arrest her.  Hummm…. Where did your pull over at? With a look like “How could you ask me that???” She said ” On top of the Howard Frankland Bridge in the middle of Tampa Bay!!!” Humm.. Why would you stop there? After another ARE YOU KIDDING ME LOOK she said “That is where Marilyn Monroe comes to me and we have conversations there!!!”  Hum…WOW we though for a minute then said ” You know spirits do not like water. Maybe if you were to talk to her from the shore line she would talk longer.”   Every time we cross the Howard Frankland we look for a stopped car. http://www.mcfilm.co/category/you-just-cant-make-this-sht-up/

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

Cruise Ship passengers say the craziest things!!! One Friday Night, on the balcony at Hamburger Mary’s in Ybor City, at 10PM there was this young couple from some small town up north. They were so excited about going on their 1st cruise. I had been taking care of them all night and they had just finished when asked them where they were going next? They asked me for a suggestion. So I was telling them to take a fun walk on 7th Ave. I went on to described some of the colorful people. Being Friday night I said “On one corner will be the religious right all telling us that we are going to hell. On the other corner is PFLAG telling us we are loved. The young girl asked what is PFLAG. I said Parents and Friends of Gays & Lesbians. With a surprised look she said “WHAT you have Gays & Lesbians HERE!!!?? I have never meet a Gay guy before. WOW!” I just smiled and said “I’m sure you have you just didn’t realize it.” She replied back to me (A Big Queen)  “NO I WOULD KNOW A GAY GUY IF I SAW ONE!!!” Her new husband then asked “We would really like to go dancing. What’s the best club to go to?” I just couldn’t resist…. and sent them to The Honey Pot. A big GAY Club. Hum do you think she saw a Gay guy there?!? LMAO

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

Hurricane Irma was on her way to Tampa. Several of us were helping Hamburger Mary’s Ybor get ready. The restaurant was closed, Mark & Bryan were working in the main dinning room. A homeless guys with wild hair came shuffling in. We tried to tell him that we were closed today. He just continued  walking then stopped picked up a chair and…. threw it at us. He was screaming that he was going to fu*king kill us. WELL, we do crazy all the time but this was too much even for me. We went out to the balcony and got Manager Phil (All 6″3″ with big muscles) and Carrie. Phil walked up to him and told him that the police had been called and he needed to get out now. On his way out he took Bryan’s cigarettes. Screaming they were his cigs.  LOL It felt with the scene in the Wizard of Oz where the fortune teller-Wizard just sent Dorthy home during the storm. “Hope she makes it home OK.” I thought to my self where do the crazy homeless go during a hurricane? Hope he makes it thru OK. The next week we saw him again on the street. Guess he made it OK thru the hurricane.

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

We all have a favorite shirt. RIGHT? Many of us have shopped late into the night on Amazon. RIGHT? I have a favorite shirt with Florida Flamingos on it. One day I lost a button on it. A week later there the shirt was with the button replaced. I went to put it on but it was now to tight??? So the next couple of weeks I dieted. Then went to try it on again. It fit but the button was gone again??? What happened to the button?…I then took a closer look in the closet. I had purchased 2 of the same shirts on Amazon. The smaller size had the button on it. LMAO

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

This week the University of Tampa started back up. 1,000’s of people filled the dorms up. We meet a fun Italian couple from the North east. They were excite that their only son & child was starting at UT. After our 3rd cocktail together, in Ybor City asked “Is your son Gay or straight?” With a very shocked look they said…..”Nobody has every asked that question before?” Hum… “Well dose he have a girlfriend?” She replies “Oh no he is too busy studying for all that?” “OK so then he is GAY. We will see him in Ybor City. Tell him about 18 and up night at the Honey Pot. And this Thanksgiving when he comes home with his friend. That’s probably his boyfriend ” OMG then I realized did I just out this guy? BUT WAIT Mothers always know!!! The couple said that they can’t wait to come back to Ybor over the next 4 years.  Did you know there is a LGBT group at UT? http://www.ut.edu/diversity/lgbtq/

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

One late night we were at the Waffle House. In waked two guys we knew. The one is always very nice the other is a loud mouth jerk and a very mean drunk. The mean one was very drunk. When their food came he passed out face down in the plate. Then… he started to wake up. He thru up a little on to his plate. Then he actually took a bite of the food. In a very loud voice he yelled “This is the worst sh*t I have ever eaten.” His friend just said check please. To this day when ever he is rude to me I just smile and think of that night. LMAO

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

Most families have that one relative who is a gun collector enthusiast. Maybe a little too much. One year our sister for her birthday was given a gun by her husband.  Being the best sister ever, she just smiled and…. then for his birthday gave her husband a fantastic design purse. He got the message and didn’t give her any more guns LMAO GO SISTER!!!

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

I was talking with a good friend one day. She told me that she was the ultimate “Hall and Oats” fan. Everyday she just had to hear at least one of their songs. When she was away from home and her music, she would actually call… The “Hall and Oats Emergency Hot Line!” I laughed and said “That can’t me true. There really isn’t a Hall and Oats Emergency Hotline???? Is there???”   Yes there is and here is the number 719 266-2837 “OMG Its REAL!!! ” When you call they give the choice of 4 songs. then play the whole song. LOL You Just Can’t make This Up!!!

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

In 1980 we were going to USF. Mark was bartending at Casa De Largo, a Mexican restaurant on Fowler ave. mark had a favorite pair of very beat up shoes. They were so bad that his toe was sticking out of one! Carrie was out shopping a picked up a new pair of shoes for Mark. Just as Mark was getting off, he took the new shoes to the restaurant to surprise him…. Mark changed into them right away. Then the group cheered to the new shoes.  As a joke Mark put the shoes up on a shelf above the bar that was full of memorable Mexican  junk. Several years later we came back and the shoes were still there!!!!

 

You Just Can Not Make This Up

Every Friday for years the religious right protest in Ybor City. Since the presidential election the protesters have grown in numbers and vulgarity. The bible bangers want to you touch them. They have camera running and will then yell assault!!!  Then will tell you, if you pay them $100 – 500 dollars, right NOW, they will not press charges.  Don’t say anything to them ever. Usually we still just walk by and try to ignore them. My friend Chris & his wife and myself just had to stop. Chris asked if he could take a photo. The protester said proudly yes…. Then we continued on with out a problem. NOW READ The Sign + The Shirt = You Just Can Not Make This Up!!!   We think this should be a post card and read “Greetings from 7-11 in Ybor City” LMAO LMAO